Self-Examination (Philippians 2: 12-13)
12Therefore, my beloved, just as you have always obeyed me, not only in my presence, but much more now in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; 13for it is God who is at work in you, enabling you both to will and to work for his good pleasure.
Self-examination is a very personal thing. As I write these words, I wonder what attitudes lurk deep within the recesses of my mind. What justifications remain at the core of my being influencing what I perceive, and how I interact? It’s a matter of how I feel inwardly, what my self-perception is and what I want it to be, and how my relationship with God is affected. Am I capable of seeing myself accurately? As a member of the majority experience, can I sacrifice comfort and ease by placing myself under a microscope to better serve others? Can I still grow? It’s a difficult endeavor which requires my best. The ability to see clearly and respond astutely sometimes alludes even good intentions, so I must be brutally honest about development before improving from this point forward.
History teaches us how monumental of a task this is. Entire generations at their very best still either supported or condoned slavery not so long ago. Here, culture had its sway, that mystical influence that pervades tendencies and attitudes, blinding people from the harsh reality of their actions. Also, a bit later, half of the population subjugated the other half in a display of irresponsible power intent on gratification of prerogatives simply because that’s the way it had always been done. Oh, the lies we allow ourselves to believe. Is this, OK? Of course, not. Still, there are racist and misogynistic attitudes that exist today. Ask yourself, how do you perceive the minority, the alien, the stranger? Be honest. Do you anger and dishonor God while denying that some day your soul will be revealed?
More recently, did you know that Hitler came to power through legal political processes? Pandering to the attitudes, ideas, and interests of a country’s constituents, he said what was popular before being appointed to the position of chancellor in 1933. Really? A master race? Make Germany strong again? How arrogant. How vile! Still, at one point, he represented the majority opinion, an enormous wave of sentiments which lacked self-examination. The people had their reasons. And to be fair, they probably didn’t see what was coming. It causes pause, though, to consider how serious self-rationalizations can be.
The end doesn’t justify the means. We have decisions to make today. Character matters. Our personal piety tethers us to God. He cares. We should too. Our sense of wellbeing hinges on this vital relationship. Joy is in the making, if we would only allow correction.
Funny, in the measure of self-perception, I once told myself, and believed, that I had an attractive sense of humor. I thought that was what girls liked; this prerequisite to dating. So, I made myself out to be something that they like, even if it wasn’t true. I was incapable of seeing myself for what I truly was and projected a lie because it sounded good at the time. Girls saw right through it, though. I didn’t affect them that way. Had I embraced the truths about myself and taken a different track, I might have been more successful.
There is a lady who is terrible to people. She is selfish, immature, and mean. She always gets herself into trouble because she can’t get along. Yet, she buys superficial gifts for people and hands them out randomly in a gesture of good will. That is all that she sees, telling herself that she is a gift giver, a nice person. But these insignificant gestures can’t make up for the harm that she causes. Incapable of self-examination, she is a lost soul.
I heard about a man who treats his wife badly. It’s not a legal matter. Rather, his subtle ways betrayed a bad heart. He wants to be liked; he is driven by affirmation but doesn’t quite get it. People sense his dismissal as it relates to someone so vital to his life and are immediately turned off. He senses rejection, which makes him try harder, but in the wrong areas. Still, he treats his wife badly; a never-ending cycle for one incapable of seeing himself for what he is.
All of this to get to the point of asking are you capable of self-examination? If you are, you know that it’s an ongoing process. New realities bring up new questions. And new questions bring new insights. God has a way of revealing us. It’s for our own good. Thus, we can discern properly the will and wish of God for our own lives. It determines our God given success in the life that he has given us.
Some advice? Seek to be genuine; the same inside as out. Here is contentment. Here is a sense of wellbeing. Here is joy. Our prayer? “Create in me a pure heart, oh God!” Let us see ourselves accurately. Let us be malleable. Let us be humble, listening and responding to Godly instruction. Oh, the freedom associated with a clean heart. Free to mill about sharing love. Free to appreciate others. Free to live life to the full. But it comes from a sense of responsibility, of duty first. In the end are good things, better than we can imagine. God gives strength and vision. God provides insight and judgement. God blesses in innumerable ways. Yet, it’s up to us to work out our salvation with fear and trembling; not that we can earn heaven, but to the end of better glorifying God.