Our Daily Bread (Matthew 6: 11-12)
“Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”
I do not think that it is by accident that our daily bread is so closely connected with grace. Grace is something that we desperately need each and every moment of existence. It is the balm that soothes, the essential nutrient that enables us to move about with confidence, finesse, and ease. Grace given is grace received.
What I am talking about here, though, is not so much as grace between individuals, but grace to yourself. Have you ever felt embarrassed? Has an interaction ever turned awkward? Did you say something wrong? Did you not understand the deep complexities of a situation before giving advice? Did you make someone angry, or turn them off? Do you ever second guess yourself? It is helpful to understand that no situation has overtaken you except what is common to people (1 Corinthians 10: 13). We are all human, which means that we are all flawed, limited, and fallible. The Christian walk is a steady, sustained movement in growth. Those things that affect you today are merely lessons to be learned within the timeframe of a lifetime. So, be gracious to yourself and have perspective.
When we feel defensive, we often react. Regrets make us feel defensive and our tendency is to revert to unpolished instinct. Instinct, as you know, is not necessarily a trustworthy impetus for successful interactions. Here, we do not think clearly. We are not circumspect or level headed. In these moments, and the moments that follow, it is essential to recognize the power of self-forgiveness. This has the potential to diffuse the situation and enables us to gain control. God knows that trials and temptations abound. For this reason, “he gives us more grace” (James 4: 6). Maybe we can honor God’s gracious disposition by being gracious to ourselves.
Some people’s ministries place them in critical situations more than their fair share of the time. Thoughts about saying the wrong thing, or not finding the words to say the right thing, the helpful thing, the necessary thing, abound. Life is improv, and the ability to improvise grows with experience. But you have to allow occasional failure, to feel the angst of disappointment; for this is the incubator of future success.
I learned a great deal regarding helpful techniques, baseline approaches to active listening in CPE. What others taught about what it takes to successfully fill “the” role of ministry were invaluable. But, regretfully, no one intimated to me the truth that all it really takes is for a person to just be a feeling human; that I am good enough just as I am. Nothing more than earnest love, compassion, and sympathy are required. Sometimes it is alright to simply admit that I am overwhelmed with the magnitude of the situation, that words escape me. Sometimes presence, just the effort to be there and share, says more than any thought could convey.
So cultivate your soul looking toward the long run. But, in the meantime, in receiving your daily bread, do not underestimate the power that comes from being gracious to yourself. God’s grace brings the peace of humility, which is ultimately your inspiration! God needs you to be healthy. A part of this is you practicing self-forgiveness. And you just might find that by being gracious to yourself, you are better equipped to be patient and forgiving to others: which glorifies God.